Friday, January 11, 2008

butting heads

Well, I would have hoped that after such a long break I would have some truly wonderful things to post however I am sitting in the living-room singularly uninspired since my sinuses are full of gloop and my hair, folks, my hair is full of cat sick. Yes, you heard it right, the cat has just thrown up in my hair. OK, yes, so I have washed it out but not really to what I’d call my own satisfaction and so there is a nice steaming bath waiting for me, after I wash it out a third time in the sink.

The reason the cat has just thrown up into my hair is that the frog had a craving for fast food and picked up a carton of chicken on the way home. The fact that this chicken smelled mainly of vinegar didn’t deter our dust-bin of a cat from clambering onto the frog’s chest and getting between him and his own plate so that he could steal what he felt to be rightfully his share, which he then threw up quietly into my hair about ten minutes later. This without even having the grace to make any of those gulping noises that polite cats make to warn one they are about to lose their K-Fry into one’s newly washed locks.

He is now lying peacefully beside me, unlike the spud who has been up twice already demanding a bottle and then demanding to fall asleep curled up in my lap, no mean feat given the size of this child. While he was falling asleep the first time he mumbled a few little things (duguyduguy…ehhhh) and reach sweetly up to run his fingers across my cheek and then through my hair, which, as it was soaking wet and cold from the last washing, woke him up sufficiently to require another 5 minutes to settle him down.

He had a good day today, the spud, starting off with a play-date in the house of a much better-off little boy who has a vertiginous pile of toys that go ‘beep’ and do things and cars one can ride on and numerous other items which can distract 4 little boys for sufficient time for their mothers to drink an entire cup of tea each and eat a cake. Following this triumph he ran wild in Homebase followed around by his tired mother and then had a sound nap followed by a brick-by-brick deconstruction of his abode.

He’s entered what his childminder delicately termed his ‘wrecker’ phase, which basically means that he is deconstructing pretty much everything. He has, for example, a book with a little beeper in it that you press at strategic points in the story and yesterday I entered the nursery to find the book in shreds and the beeper neatly extracted. I’m not sure what’s more annoying, that he tore the book to shreds or that he is now to be found wandering around the flat pressing the damn beeper over and over and over again. He’s getting much more difficult to please and significantly more difficult to placate in times of strife, which are also becoming more frequent.

Where-as a few scant months ago all I had to do was to put on the big ‘no’ face to make him stop doing something awful, now I have to not only make the face, the sound and the gesture but I have to make it several times. When I have finally counted to ‘3’ and gone to remove him bodily from whatever he was doing, he no longer just comes with me and moves on to something else – no, now we have an argument about it which starts with him shouting at me and trying to keep doing whatever it was; continues with him digging in his feet and becoming all elbows and shoulders trying to get rid of me and finishes with him running on the spot with his eyes shut, his fists clenched and his bottom lip out like a plate, all the while grizzling and complaining and, sometimes, shouting. Finally, he sits down and cries and has to be lifted bodily away from whatever it was and then distracted by something new and non-problematic.

Luckily this is not as frequent an occurrence as my head-aches would lead me to believe and we do spend more time laughing then otherwise. Today we discovered that if I butt my head into his tummy and growl, it is an hilarious jape, worthy of falling over helpless with laughter. Oh yes. Even more hilarious when said head is covered in cat sick. And on that note, I leave you for my bath.


Anonymous said...

I assume that cat sick is worse than spud sick.....

REally miss the grandson, especially miss not being there to see these phenomena.....trying not, not very successfully, to say "I remember when..."

DJ Kirkby said...

Urgh baaaaad cat! Spud, what a great kid. He sounds confident and well loved, someday he will thank you!

Sparx said...

Anonymous parental unit! - yes, cat sick is worse than spud sick. You'll see him soon enough though, I'm sure he'll have a whole new repertoire of things to show off by then! Congratulations on working out the blurting!

Sparx said...

DJ - yes, it was pretty disgusting... the first few seconds of discovery were the worst I have to say, followed by the first washing in which the true scale of the matter was revealed... ! All kids are great though, hey? Thanks for coming by!

Anonymous said...

The first anonimous parental unit may try not to say "I remember...." But your description of tantrum in the penultimate paragraph, my love, is you. I had quite the flashback there! And I still love you. Most of the time I was trying very hard not to laugh.

Sparx said...

But which anonymous parental unit is which??? I mean, I can't believe that one of them can't spell anonymous... HONEstly!

Anonymous said...

well, it wasn't me....

Jen said...

Crap! I have been blaming Dylan's new crazy personality on a reaction to the medication he has been on this week for a bacterial infection. Are you trying to tell me that this crazy behavior is NORMAL?! Think I need a nice warm bath now.

Driving With the Brakes On said...

Oh dear. We are at 2.5 years and I am still waiting for the wrecker phase to pass. I console myself by rationalizing that said destruction will only better prepare him for a career in which he gets paid to cause bodily harm to inanimate objects. Here's hoping it more than minimum wage so he can support his mother, who is going broke trying to keep in toys that can't be disassembled in 30 seconds flat!

Hope you have a lovely bath - it is well deserved . . . both thanks to the Spud and to the cat.

Nights_that_never_end said...

I love cats, I have two of my own, but they always seem to be getting sick! They will just throw up ANY WHERE!

Sparx said...

Jen, better make it a long one! Reading Driving's post it's not looking good for us for a while... I hope Dylan's behavious calms down for you - never know, maybe it is the meds! Not sure how that explains what's happening to the spud though... Good to see you!

Sparx said...

Driving - there's lots of money in demolition! Perhaps we can rent them out now and start building our pensions in advance? Currently I'm big on wooden bricks and toys that can be built and dissassembled on purpose... great to see you!

Sparx said...

Nights that never end - goodness... sounds awful! Have you had them checked out by a vet? They shouldn't be throwing up all the time... although cat's do throw up anywhere at all, it's true! Thanks for coming by!

panu said...


on another note....

nah. Ew.

Sparx said...

Panu... yes, in fact, ew is the correct response! Thanks for droping by

Raz said...

Wow, cat sick. There's a new experiment for me NOT to try.

I have to say when you write about his tantrums they sound fairly comic, but I'm sure they're not great to experience. And I would just be comforted by the "phase" word. And at least you have ways to amuse him!

ilana (Helen) Pengelly said...

Panu has it right.


The Spud's tantrums remind me of the famous waffle incident.

Eldest boy was 2.

I wasn't.

But by the end of it I wanted to be and I wanted my Mommy.

John, you see, wonderful Daddy that he is ScReWeD Up.


Two hours of non stop screaming ensued.

Don't you feel better now?


Jennie said...

Oy! I feel your pain, uh, spew.

True story: Teenage Jennie and mother just off a plane from visiting Gran in Denmark. First thing to do after dropping bags off at home is to retrieve the dogs from their two week kennel stay.

Dogs start off in back of the car, but are so excited to see their humans that they straddle us in the front seat.

The dog straddling me, caught up in the excitement, pisses. On me.

Can't quite decide if I'd rather have that or cat sick in hair. It was well meant, after all.

Jonny's Mommy said...

And throwing things..this stage is apparently where they throw things -- at the cat, at the dog, at the mommy and daddy, whatever might walk in the Toddler's path. And the heavier the better because that brings forth the best reaction from the thing having things thrown at it.

Luckily the cat has not thrown up in my hair. she has already sneezed very disgusting, very gooey and very green snot into my hair and then flicked her tail as if she was the one who had soiled.

Sparx said...

Raz - actually they are surprisingly comic to tell the truth... the trick is not to laugh however or he wins! Good to see you!

Sparx said...

Helen - Oh. My. Goodness. Cutting the waffle in the wrong room! A friend endured a massive tantrum from her eldest because she bit too big a bite from his chocolate bar - and he wouldn't accept a new chocolate bar in trade... all this to come!

Sparx said...

Jenny - my turn to say 'ewww'!!!! I have a more disgusting story then that about a pet though... I had a friend with a highly, er, excitable, shall we say, un-neutered male kitten who... oh I can't go on... but it involved her pillow while her head was on it... Great to see you!

Sparx said...

Jonny's Mommy - ah yes, we're having throwing things as well... luckily he mostly aims at the floor and just misses his feet - so far things are not flying all over the place! Bet you can't wait! Good to see you.

AnnaKat said...

My son is 5 and he still does the temper tantrum thing...and he's articulate darn it!
You're a very funny mummy and the spud is too cute! Enjoyed your blurt & look forward to more...minus the cat sick, maybe. (You have my sympathies on that one.)

Sparx said...

Annakat - many thanks! Although... not sure I'm looking forward to that many years of temper tantrums. Although I'm quite looking forward to him being able to argue using reason. That'll be the day! Thanks for coming by!

Dhor said...

First - MY GRACIOUS you are SO DAMN HILARIOUS in describing the whole cat thing. God there is just something about the way you write that PLUCKS at my inner strings and makes me agree and laugh and just.. everything!

Okay, and forgive me but isn't Charlie really SMART about the whole digging out the noise-maker from the book? I mean I guess that sucks for the book but dang, that's like for real thinking and problem solving and searching and working and just SMART!! Good for him, (sorry for you) but really, what a neat kiddo.

Pig in the Kitchen said...

Cat sick in the hair is a low momwnt isn't it? I'm enjoying the banter between you and your Mum!

Frog in the Field said...

Well, I don't quite know what to say - the life you lead!!
Baths are definitely the best medicine, take a flake and a large glass of Shiraz with you, I would recommend a book, but the one I'm reading is about Cats.

Sparx said...

Dhor - why thank you Ma'am for saying such nice things about my little one - just makes my day when someone is encouraging! Thanks for the kind word me dear and great to see you as always!

Sparx said...

Pig in the Kitchen - a low moment indeed! Nothing quite like it I have to say... and hopefully never again. Great to see you!

Sparx said...

Frog in the Field - a glass of Shiraz and a flake! I love you! What a great idea... might have to try that one out tonight. Great to see you!

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