Thursday, July 31, 2008

Hair today...

OK, so our son needs a haircut. The thing is, he has an incipient mass of blonde curls and everyone keeps telling us that if we cut them off, they won't grow back. I had a mass of strawberry ringlets when very young however now my hair hangs only just on the curly side of 'wavey' and so I, or rather we, are scissor resistant.

Back in May when Mum was about to arrive, I was all about setting him an appointment at Trotters for one of their special 'first haircuts' where children sit in model cars and have their first curl preserved in a little box. Oh, I was all about that first-curl-in-a-box. Now I am all about the first-curl-still-attached-to-his-head - and so, it appears, is the frog.

Well, you would, wouldn't you?

A few months ago, cutting his hair seemed a pressing issue. 'No no' other Mums would tell their offspring as they pushed their way in front of my little potato 'Let the little girl go first'. Little girl? Little girl? Didn't the pirate tee give him away?

Apparently, in this day and age where modern parents are terrified of imposing gender stereotypes on their little puddings, guessing the sex of anyone under, say, 11 years old, is damn near impossible. I dread being roped into playground conversations with unknown Mums because eventually I'm going to have to take a stab at guessing whether their little darling is 'him' or 'her'. This is because once, despite the fact her pumpkin was wearing blue and had a crew cut, I greatly offended one Mum by not guessing that her pushy little car-clutching nightmare was a girl.

I, however, am not innocent here. I have, bad mother that I am, been known to paint the spud's toenails. In fact if he spots me having a go at my own I am under fairly persistent pressure to paint at least one of his...however, crucially, when someone told me 'your daughter has lovely hair' I was happily un-offended because any mother displaying a child wearing yellow with long blonde curls and blue toenails is clearly asking for it - and it seems, I don't particularly care.

These days however, brushing and drying the spud's locks is taking longer and longer and is incurring increasing levels of toddler impatience, not to mention toddler wrath, toddler screaming and toddler struggling. And, if said toddler goes to bed with wet, un-brushed curls, he wakes up with either a single, massive dreadlock or worse, bad, eighties, Flock of Seagulls hair.

Spot the difference:

So. We have established that we don't care what people think about his hair. We have established that he has truly lovely curls and we have established that maintaining it is causing a breakdown of parent/toddler relations.

What we haven't established is whether or not we are actually going to cut it and this is where you come in, dear reader...s...

Scissors? Or no scissors?


Anonymous said...

Hmm, yes, we have this dilemma ourselves. The question is more, how hard/easy is it to brush Spud's golden locks?

When it gets to the point that I have to give Dante a ten minute swiss miracle hair treatment before I can get a brush in his mangled dreads, I cut. If it's only a struggle-for-three-minutes-with-a-samsonite-three year old-in-the-tub brushing, we leave it be.

Anonymous said...

This was a major dilemma at our house as well. Cooper had the most gorgeous head of hair . . . but I grew tired of the struggles, as well as of people mistaking him for a little girl, so off to the barber we went. As hard as it was to watch his beautiful baby curls fall to the floor, seeing him take on the 'look' of the little boy that he had already become made it all okay. And now that he rarely stops moving, I pin him down every 3 weeks and take the clippers to him.

I think he is darling, and I agree with Jennie - as long as the battle is managable, leave it be. When it starts doubling for marathon training, it's time.

Jonny's Mommy said...

I finally had to cut Jonathan's when he was a little under a year because it was all in his face. he had these curls in the back that were just adorable.

I was heart broken to see them fall to the floor.

Of course, no one thought he was a girl but...I think it is totally up to you, though. WHo cares what other people think. If you don't, then leave it be. I think he's adorable!

Jonny's Mommy said...

I meant to say if you don't care...yeah. I gotta go to bed. It's 11:37 p.m. here as I right.

Anonymous said...

Our family are currently in the process of persuading my 11-year-old cousin he wants to have his curls chopped off. When it reaches the nose, you know it's too long.

I would say... do what you like. If you're not worried about him being mistaken for a girl, then have no shame and go forth into curldom! It doesn't matter that much.

On the other hand, it could always grow back curly. At some point you'll have to bravely swallow and take the plunge... after all, he's unlikely to keep that hair forever.

Mom de Plume said...

Perhaps I am just lazy but I would love to give my DAUGHTER'S hair (which is a bird's nest every morning)a #4 to avoid the brushing thing (of course I won't because neither she nor her father would speak to me until it grew out!)! I am planning my Son's first cut already and he is only 6 months. Having said this, beautiful curls like Spud's they have not!!! A difficult decision to say the least!

DJ Kirkby said...

Wash his hair less often and earlier in the day. Just say no to the scissors!

Tara@From Dawn Till Rusk said...

NO to the scissors. His hair is adorable and will be even more adorable when he's about 4 (can you stick it out that long?) with angelic blond curls. I have the same problem with my daughter - she's always mistaken for a boy because a. she cut her own hair off and b. she likes to dress like her brother. doens't bother me at all though but it's fun to see people squirm when I have to put them right!

jenny said...

My sister in law took ages to cut her boys hair because their hair was blond and curly just like the Spuds. I thought it was lovely hair, but with the last boy, it was very girly-looking and I always wondered when they would cut his hair. I thought he looked so much better after they finally cut his hair when he was about 2 1/2 years old.

Of course, it's all up to you and how you want to deal with his hair. He will always be a cutie pie, whether with short or long hair.

Frog in the Field said...

Until our middle daughter was 2 and a half, everyone thought she was a boy.
We were on a flight to the US.
A lady from Newcastle kept smiling.."What's his name?" she enquired.
"Jasmine" I said.
Her face fell and she screeched "Jasmine!! For a boy??!!"

Tara@From Dawn Till Rusk said...

Frog, that is so funny. I get that all the time. Can almost hear people whispering "fancy making her son wear pink!"

Michelle said...

Say no to the scissors until you are certain that you are ready to say goodbye to the curls. All the people are right...they'll never be the same after you cut them.

Sue said...

I only started chopping his hair off when I realised hwo much The Bhablet suffered in the heat.

I love those curls but if they are giving Spud grief, take lots of photos and videos and chop 'em off.

Elsie Button said...

i love the fact that as a toddler he already has quite a high maintenance washing/drying/brushing routine!!

He has got gorgeous locks though - you gotta keep them, surely!

When my brother and i were little everyone thought he was a girl and i was boy!

VMc said...

Here in Mallorca there is a tradition where you shave the child's head when it turns one.... apparently it makes the hair grow back stronger, once they have been dunked in the med. Not surprisingly I don't know a single parent here who has done that!

What a toughie. I had to cut my daughter's hair, and she loved it. She won't sit still or even entertain hair brushing or hair washing, but hair cutting for some reason is okay by her. Go figure. I've added your blog to my listing as it's nice to have some UK based parenting to turn to when the Mallorquin traditions go completely mad!


Shannon said...

I know that I'm late but I say if there is doubt, don't do it. We cut off the curls just before Ben's second b-day because it was bugging him. It wasn't the loss of the curls that got me, it was the loss of the baby look. He went in my baby and came out a big boy. Yep, I cried.

Hoto said...

Jesus. Cut that hair.

Sparx said...

Hi everyone - sorry I haven't commented or stopped by, I've not been able to access blogger at all for the last week however access is back up and running - hooray!

I think we're going to wait - Jennie, you deffo have the same problem, Dante and Spud have exactly the same hair so will take your guidance!

Fishsticks - awwww... thanks for the vote!

Jonny's Mummy - your son has LOADS of hair too!

Raz - thanks for the vote - crossing fingies it all grows back when we do cut it.

Mom de Plume - a #4! maybe not your daughter?!!

DJ - good one, thanks!

Tara - oh, poor you!

Jenny - sigh. Yes you're probably right... but... but... but...

Forg - no! Boy, you really make me laugh!

Michelle - oh no! Sniff!

Sue - not you too?!

Elsie - v funny! I use product on his hair too... shhhh...

VMC - welcome! Thanks for the comment, will drop by for a visit. Hate the idea of shaving the head at 1 though!

Shannon - aha, now THAT's what I'm afraid of!

Hoto - you have Too Much Time on your hands!!

Frog in the Field said...

Great another boost to my flagging confidence...people are always laughing at me!!

Heza Hekele said...

Do you have to go for an all out cut? Can't you just trim it into something more manageable...shorter, but not short? I would keep it long-ish, but at least to a maintenance clipping every few months. The curls...they rock!

Sparx said...

Frog - WITH you, dear one, WITH you...!

Heza - aw, thanks! Did just that, by the way!