At the start of the spud’s little life, I confess that we played fast and loose with his bedtime. I mean, we tried to get him to sleep every night around 7, but if he wasn’t tired or if he kicked up a fuss, we were
After considerable reading and listening to friends, I finally caved in and worked out a sort-of-a routine. Slowly, slowly, we started to stick to it. And you know what?
Now, after several months, our sort-of-a-routine has firmed up into something robust enough that the spud is now anticipating every little step. Come 6pm he’s whining for his sippy cup and I put on ceebeebies and he sits on his beanbag with juice and a little snack gaping at Upsy Daisy while I put out his dinner and then put him in his high chair. After a variable amount of food, he gets down and stuck into some serious playing – we’re talking Speed Playing here - throwing every toy out of his box and clambering around the house clutching a ball in one hand and often something in his mouth as well. It’s important, you see, because it the Last Play Of The Day and he has to cram it all in at once.
Up until a couple of weeks ago, he would stand by the bath while I undressed him and, inspired by the water running, might have had a little wee-wee while he watched intently as it filled. Now, however, he's not interested in the water running At All. Now, the bath running is like the final bell signifying 'end of playtime' so as soon as his clothes are off, my little naked son tears off across the floor as fast as he can crawl, giggling and cackling while I stomp behind him saying things like ‘I’m going to get you’ and ‘I’m right behind you’ until squealing, he throws himself headlong onto the sheepskin rug (I know, I know, it’s like a Mills and Boon novel round ours) to be tickled. It’s about as cute as a baby can get, frankly and I’m still not quite sure how I managed it. I guess I figured I’d probably pop out a baby who already had a tattoo and both Joy Division albums. But there you go, or rather, there he goes, giggling away madly. The end of the routine sees him lying with his bottle while I lie beside reading him a book. If he’s perky, once he's done he wriggles off the bed and tries to rush to his toys before I can stop him but once I pick him up and carry him into his room, no matter how lively he was the moment before, he snuggles into my shoulder and sighs a bit and most of the time, he’s asleep before I even put him to bed.
I do credit the routine for this. Every step of the way, from the moment Iggle Piggle gets into his boat until the moment he gets carried into his room he knows what’s coming next - and it all leads to a nice big sleep and, not to forget, a nice big martini for Mummy while the Great God Routine rumbles away happily in his alphabetised heaven.
Amen to that!
23 comments:
and you do it again! enjoyable post
'Speed playing' lol! We experience that too! Well the Aspergers version... actualy 'playing' doesnt really come into it...aw heck I know what I mean even if I can't explain it!
Oh man. Watch me turn a bright, violent green. Routine did nothing. I mean, it got The Bhablet to recognise the inevitability of having to sleep once in his cot, but it didn't save us from the screaming and the violent protests.
He has his say and only then falls asleep.
God bless nice little spuds.
Cara - ack, you're so kind, thanks so much for visitng - and congratulations again!
DJ - I can imagine N3S doing a lot of things at high speed - playing just being the start of it! Good luck!
Sue - The spud took ages to really buy into the routine - after a few days of it he really resisted as he knew what was coming but now, a few months down the line we're A-OK with routine, praise be!
I myself was routine resistant, but now sing its glory. The problem with routine is, just when I, I mean Dylan, get used to the current one, he has changed so much we need a new one!
oh darn. what did you go and do that for. i hate routines. and i hate books that preach routine. and now you've gone and sold me on it. i've sold out.
Jen - it's true, it does have to be flexible to a certain extent, eh? I think so long as the bones of it stay the same it works well - good to see you, hope it's all going well.
Mad Momma! It's odd, we've gone back and forth. Originally I wanted to routine the spud because it sounded so good, but he just wouldn't stick to it and it proved too rigid for me as well. I've gone back to routine because it works, but we did develop a routine around his natural rhythms which is possibly why it works for us all. Good to see you, thanks for popping over!
I still have a love-hate relationship with Routine after four years. I LOVE the fact that I can rest assured that our boy goes to bed at seven thirty pm and falls asleep immediately, but I HATE that inevitably spontaneous nights out, or just hanging out on the sofa all Sunday afternoon are gone forever... Give and take, give and take ;)
Still, a good routine is what keeps children feeling safe and nurtured until they're about, what is it these days? Thirteen? :D
I love routine, the kids love routine, they just don't know it. We have changed the bed times, Rebecca who is nearly 8 has changed from 7.15/7.30 to 8pm and Lee who's 10 has changed from 8/8.30 to 9/9.15 the poor boy all his friends are still roaming the streets, but I live safe in the knowledge they are not tired, they are happy and not cranky like some of their friends.
As for me, my routine has gone. I liked when they were both in bed by 8, I could still with a cup of tea and still had time to do something constructive like clean or iron, now I just drink tea and go to bed.
i have to admit i have had a bit of a routine obsession ever since betty was born... feeding, napping, bedtime at the same time every day. I really firmly believe that that is why she started sleeping through the night from 3 months. i have met such critisicm along the way though - no-one else seems to believe in routine - i sometimes feel like a real alien. So it's good to hear you say all this. I also love hearing other people's routines, so thanks! A lovely post!
It's true, it's true! I do understand, I was an anti-routine girl myself until parenthood. In truth after having a child, I ceased to speak in absolutes - about ANYTHING!
milk this for all it's worth. my son used to be an easy-bedder, unlike my daughter. now he is ghandi-like in his protesting. that would be fine if he weren't so heavy. i swear i only broke the routine once! okay twice. okay there was a weekend away. i'll go now.
Tag!
You're it.
Bel - LOL! Yes, spontaneity has rather gone I'm afraid - but so has the spud's spontaneous bedtimes, ie, 9pm! I think at my age that I'm happy with that!
SEM - I remember the joyous days when my bedtimes moved back! Unfortunately for my poor Ma I am nearly completely nocturnal when left to my own devices so whatever it was that my parents set as bedtime was never late enough. I guess I have that to look forward to, my Mum is rubbing her hands in glee at the thought of me getting my come-uppance! Good to see you!
Hi Elsie! I tried to routine the Spud very early but it wasn't to be. I'm impressed by those Mums I know who have managed it without trauma. I was happy to let him cry but I had a very short limit on that so after 5 minutes it all went to hell in a handbasket! Lovely to see you online, hope all's well.
Lady M - Every day is something new indeed, nothing is absolute - but it is rather nice to know I can be settled down to a nice dinner with the frog without baby interference, much as I love him! Good to see you back, will have to whip over to get the news on your trip!
Holly - V funny! The spud will never be gandhi-like I'm afraid... too active! Only breaking the routine once, that's an achievement! Thank's for dropping over!
Sue - ulp!
I love your blurt! Will be part of my routine now to see how this routine works for the spud... And with luck he'll grow up to be one of those kiddos who hate routine the moment they grow up! ;D
Anansi - thanks for coming by! I hope he's like that too, too much routine in an adult is a worrying thing. Now, I'm sure it's past my bedtime...
My kids are older now and I am sTiLl RoUtInE DePeNdAnT! In our house 8pm sees our 10 year old foster son off for 1/2 an hours reading time. As his light goes out at 8:30 our 11 year old is off to brush his teeth before settling in for a 1/2 hour of reading time. Quiet is finally beginning to descend on the house. 9 pm and it's light's out for Ryan and Callum at 13 is off to brush those teeth. He heads down to the teenager's lair in the basement and out comes the wine in the livingroom. I LOVE ROUTINE!
Blessings & Good Cheer
Helen
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