I envy those who manage to blog frequently... so often these days I either have
a - nothing to say or
b - no memory of what it was I thought I had to say earlier when I was doing something else.
So here I go, trying to wrest some content out of the shallows of my brain pan. I've been trying to learn how to relax recently. You know those bogus questionnaires that ask stupid and meaningless questions with the goal of either promoting some dreadful product or wasting a slack 10 minutes on the bus? You know the ones 'if you were an animal, which animal would you be?' - at the end they tell the reader that one is a wolf with killer instincts or something equally flattering and one bounces off to work feeling all empowered; only to realise that one is in fact a mouse, or perhaps some sort of invertebrate lagoon dweller and one's day is swiftly shot to hell, along with one's self image.
Anyway, I suppose I've always quite fancied myself as some sort of romantic creature; perhaps a deer, swift and mysterious; or a cat, cunning and fast - or perhaps something terribly laid-back and calm. The truth, I realise, is that I'm more like a rabbit; I'm constantly flitting about in a state of high nerves and am capable of long periods of deep hibernation. Actually, I'm pretty much always in a state of high activity.
I've tried a few things to combat this; exercise, booze, meditation;a friend has recommended some NLP techniques which occasionally help. Sadly my brain is a match for anything I throw at it and the result is that sometimes it sort of goes into overload and bits of it disconnect from other bits; which is where I find myself at the moment, with some sort of internal disconnect. I just can't make things match up, as thought two parts of my brain are thinking independently and I just can't communicate with myself.
Which means, of course, that communicating with this blog is hopeless... which won't exactly stop me but might just keep slowing me down.